The Coming Of Spring

Everyone keeps saying how "nice this weather is" and it's starting to really irk me. I don't comprehend enjoying unseasonable warmth in the middle of winter. I can see how people enjoy spring, but I do not. I hate sneezing and I hate pastels. Loving temps approaching 100 seems insane to me (unless you're at the beach or pool). I am a hardcore winter girl. Fall is my favorite because it's so pretty, but it's never cold enough when the leaves are changing.

Even though we have many more weeks of cold weather (OR AT LEAST WE BETTER), you warm-weather lovers have me upset already about spring approaching. Like how some people get the winter blues, I get upset when the weather starts to warm up. So, because of this, I have enacted a Birthday* Rule:


There will be no mention of spring until after my birthday week.

Thank you...

Xo,
SVR


*My birthday is 17 Feb!!!!!

Hateful

Apparently cedar pollen is high today. Today I woke up feeling like someone had poured pollen on my face. Therefore, I am allergic to cedar trees. Therefore, I hate cedar trees.

Big Man With A Gun

The other day, when on the phone with my sister, I said, "Are you okay? You sound distracted. Does someone have a gun to your head and you're trying to let me know to send help!?" She said no, she was fine and not to send help, but from there I decided that we needed to decide on our own code in case the situation of a big man with a fun ever arises. Or woman, whatever. I'm not sexist when it comes to crazies with guns.

Yesterday I called her again and before we hung up I said we should practice and pretend like it was one of those terrifying situations. At first, instead of deciding on what we would say, we just jumped into the role-playing*:

Scarlet: "Okay, well, I'll talk to you later!"


Ali: "...Okay. I'll talk to you...llaaaattteeerrrrrrrr."


Scarlet: "Oh No! Does someone have a gun to your head!?"


Ali: "Scarlet, if someone has a gun to my head, I'm not going to be able to answer that."


Scarlet: "Oh."


So we tried again. This time we switched roles**:


Ali: "Bye!"


Scarlet: "Bye! I'm going to go take a nap now."


Ali: "Scarlet, that doesn't flow very well. The guy with the gun is going to know you're trying to let me know what's going on."


Scarlet: "Oh, true, but I was just trying to think of something that you would know I'd never do."


Ali: "Good thinking. Let's modify that. Try again..."


Scarlet: "Bye, Ali!"


Ali (now she's the one with the imaginary gun to her head, in case you lost track): "Bye! Enjoy this amazing and beautiful spring weather!"


Scarlet: *dials 911 because no way in hell would either of us utter the above sentence.* "Haha, wouldn't it be funny if then the gunman adds on, 'Yeah, it's so nice outside!' I wish I could be outside enjoying the warmth."


Ali: "Well, he's a crazed gunman, of course he'd like spring."



So, we're set. If I ever call Ali, or she calls me, and one of us mentions the "nice warm spring weather" we will know to call 911. Hmmm, this will only work until June and then we'll modify it to "this nice 100 degree weather!"


XO,
SVR

*Although, is it role-playing if we're playing ourselves?
**Well, I was still Scarlet and she was still Ali.