Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Fakey Fake

I had a roommate in college who wore the most insanely padded push up bras. She would always lay out her clothes for the day ahead and at first I would wonder what small person was hiding under her clothes until I realized it was her bra making the enormous bumps. And she was a pretty petite person.

What I could never comprehend was what happened when she got it on with her boyfriend...and let me tell you, I know first-freaking-hand that they got it on a lot. Hold on while I cry from the memory of waking up to the sounds of them having sex. So all day long her boyfriend is thinking, "YEAH! My girl has huge tits! I'm the luckiest guy in the world!" and then hanky panky time would come around and she'd take off her bra and he would feel like he had vertigo because he couldn't find what he had just seen.

Please explain.

Holly Madison, from Holly's World, was saying that she used to stuff her bra (pre implants, of course), but it backfired because she got a boyfriend and she couldn't let him touch her boobs for months because she had to slowly stuff her bra less and less.

This thought/memory came to me earlier today because I was thinking about how much I loathe summer. I always feel gorgeous in the winter, but in the summer it sure is hit or miss. How can sweating be pretty? How is frizzy hair nice? I feel like summer is my padded push up bra. It's not the real me.


1 comment:

Unknown said...

This is brilliant.