Monday, September 24, 2007

Everybody Knows That You Are Insane

I went to a friend's party on Saturday and, while I had a lot of fun, I left the evening being completely sick of the following two questions:

1) Are you two dating?


2) What happened with you and whatsherface?

I guess it's good to set things straight and dispel incorrect rumors, but after telling the same stories over and over, I start to get bored with them. Question #1 is easy. Basically it's no one's business and if anyone knows me at all, they'll know not to ask me in front of a large group. Question #2 is more difficult if only because it is so old and I am done explaining it. Or explaining what I can. I think at this point I might just make stuff up. People want to hear something salacious anyway and I'm here for the people, right? Haha. Or, what also works is letting people fill in the gaps with their own guesses since 9 times out of 10, they're right, and, if they're not, I can always correct them, right?



Randi said...

Just tell everyone you are f---ing the guy you hang out with all of the time and that you slept with Allie's dad or something. Just lie for the sake of lying... it'll make you feel better. My sister and I used to tell everyone we had different fathers just because. It was fun. Some people actually believed us!

CBK said...

Am I reading the second question right?

Ant said...

Hee! Yes, reading it the way you've phrased it does kind of suggest that you're into a bit of the old lady-loving...

I'm suddenly very interested in the answers...

(Kidding, of course! :-) )

Pink Is Neat said...

Please leave my dad out of this.

And please don't refer to me as whatsherface. I do have a name.

minijonb said...

When someone asks you this, tell them you dropped the old whattheirface so you could have an illicit affair with their spouse/boy/girlfriend/s.o.whatever and you are suprised they haven't figured it out yet.

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Miss Scarlet said...

Randi- Hahha, no sex with dads.

CBK- The two questions are unrelated:)

Ant- As my dear friend Serena says, "strictly dickly."

Pink is neat- Who said I'm talking about you? And if I was, would you really rather me put your name and a link? It was more the fact that people were asking me ad nauseum about shite.

minijonb- Hahaha, nothing illicit please!

Anonymous said...

If I'm the whatsherface referred to in question 2, then I believe I can safely say that the answer is that you "borrowed" and subsequently wrecked the submarine I got last year for my birthday. You knew it was my most prized possession! HOW COULD YOU?!!

Kristabella said...

Holy shit! This is why you need to read the blog and comments and NOT catch up in Bloglines!

I love these comments!

I agree with Randi. Make shit up. And obviously NOT about Allie's dad. She doesn't care too much for it.

Senor Beavis said...

That's more than slightly brazen of your friends to use that stuff as party conversation. I almost never ask people if they're dating. I figure if they want to tell me, they will.