So yesterday I worked 130-10pm at Barnes and Noble in the music section which means I'm pretty much alone all day. As a result of this, I sometimes don't mind the occasional chat with a customer. So when a dad-like man came in and responded to my "Hi, how are you?" and continued the conversation, I went with it. But somehow the conversation went from talking about the weather to him telling me to "make a list of what you want in a [guy] and then it becomes like a goal and you will go after it"? (direct quote!) Now, talking about the weather I can do. Talking about music I can do. But talking about potential suitors with a stranger? WEIRD! SO. VERY. WEIRD.
But damn him, he got me thinking about it.
First of all, I don't like what he said. To make that sort of thing a goal is ridiculous, in my opinion. It makes it sound like NOT getting what could potentially be written down as "The Ideal" would result in failure, or disappointment.
Second of all, it seems weird to me to make a list. Now, I have standards (Boy, do I have standards!) but they aren't cut and dry. I don't think things like, "The future Mr. Scarlet Rose (or The Future Scarlet Rose's boyfrien') must have brown eyes and speak Swahili." or "The Future Mr. Scarlet Rose (or The Future Scarlet Rose's Gentleman Caller) must be at least 3 inches taller than me and like Radiohead." Sure, there are things I gravitate towards (humor, intelligence, easy on the eyes) but they aren't requirements or something I have on a checklist somewhere where 80% equals passing and therefore the opportunity to fall madly in love with me. It just sounds so odd to me to go around with the mentality of specifics. The people I am going to relate well with and keep around will possess the characteristics I need at that time. And I'm not just talking about Future Mr. Scarlet Roses' (whoa, plural!?) (or Future Scarlet Roses' purse holders) but friends, too. So the following is my list for "what I want in The Future Scarlet Rose's [fill in the blank]":
*human (male if fulfilling role other than just friend)
*non-killer
*Does not hurt puppies
*sense of humor (I've got to get specific on this one because I can't live with the sound of crickets everytime I say something funny.)
So thank you, Weird, Creepy, Barnes and Noble Customer, I've made my list.
13 comments:
I used to think I had no requirements. But, now I have MANY--probably insuring that I'll die alone.
I have preferences...but not requirements.
Oh and I love THIS!
I fit those requirements.
Creep indeed. I was a grocery bagger in high school and I'll never forget what happened when I asked a man what his bagging prefernce was (meaning paper or plastic). He definitely said, 'You'll do.' Eww. What's with these losers?
Coyote Mike- I'll keep you in mind.
Sweet- I worked in a grocery store in high school, too. I got so many creepy comments and invitations to "parties at the river"...UGH!
Now you just need a scorecard so when you meet them, you can do a quickie eval on them, and either date them, or move on!
i agree with smash...i have a long list of things i will like...but an equally long list of things that i will not put up with; and it's THIS list that i should be paying more attention to these days, i think.
That's so funny! I agree with you, making a list sounds like it'd be limiting, you know?
Once, I stepped on my cousin's dog's tail and it went away yelping. Is that considered "hurting a puppy?"
I'd like to hope it was unintentional, so the benefit of the doubt would be on your side ...
Velvet- I'm thinking something small...and maybe laminated.
RD- I don't want to rule anyone out (for friends or otherwise) but I'll know when someone isn't meant to be in my circle.
Cheryl- Exactly!
Neil- Did you do it on purpose?
Anthony/Tony- I need to not talk to strangers;)
Ant- I like the idea of the sugar cube!
I think dating advice from strangers is kind of dubious. Here's my advice: don't take dating advice from strangers. Of course you don't really know me so...
Seriously my advice is this - what's right and what's wrong sometimes isn't so obvious.
Neil - if I had a dime for everytime I've accidentally stepped on one of my cats' tails I'd have, well like a dollar or so.
You know I think lists are limiting. It's like Ravena's height and erm, xxx, requirement. If you automatically throw up road blocks, you may miss something amazing you might have made an exception for.
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