Tuesday, October 07, 2008

I Wanna Grow Up To Be A Politican

It's rare you will ever get me to comment on politics. I prefer to follow the Rose mantra of "Ladies don't discuss politics" and really, it's worked out quite well for me. I find that when I do start to talk about politics, I quickly regret it because no one ever changes their mind and it's almost as rare for a political discussion to not get heated. I got angry at a coworker today who said something bad about The White Stripes, but at least where that was concerned, we were not offending each others morals and fundamental beliefs. Substitute McCain in for Jack White and Obama for Chad Kroeger of Nickelback and you can see how invested each side could potentially get when trying to win the debate of "who is the better guitar player?!" So today, like I do with politics, I ended the discussion quickly since I was not going to change my own opinion and neither was my coworker and now we can both enjoy music without hating each other.

But tonight, in honor of the Town Hall Meeting Debate, I am going to blog about politics. Relish this, my friends. It won't happen again.

In the 5th grade I pushed aside my shy tendencies and decided that I wanted to join my friends in the political world of Grace Miller Elementary. I decided to run for Treasurer of the Student Council Association (SCA). I was scared to take this on, but I rest assured in the realization that no adult was ever going to trust a 10 year old with actual money. Basically it was a way to stand out a little more and get out of class every once and awhile, which has always been a goal of mine*.

After declaring myself in the running for Treasurer, I headed home and brainstormed with my mom to figure out my slogan. I'm not sure who thought this up, but I went with: "Rose Knows Money"...get it**? My mom and I then spent all evening making up fake money that said, "Rose Knows Money" where it usually says, "The United States Of America". (Fake money, my friends. I would never deface or waste the real stuff!) The next morning my mom drove me to school early so I could go in all of the classrooms and deliver my slogan money onto my peers' desks. About halfway through this task I started to regret the decision. Why give 1st graders things with words anyway? All they want to do is wiggle and finger paint***.

So I proceeded to hang my posters: "ROSE KNOWS MONEY!" Yes she does! I knew it then and I know it now. Money is good and I know it. That afternoon everyone running for an office got up in front of the entire school and gave a speech. I can't remember my speech, but I'm pretty sure I said, "ROSE KNOWS MONEY!" I was very proud of that slogan. It was also slightly terrifying for me to speak in front of the entire school. The last time I had done that, at the time, was at the 4th grade spelling bee when I lost on the word 'luxurious'****.

I can't remember to whom I lost the election, but I did indeed lose. However, a few years later I realized I had actually won since I ended up joining way cooler clubs and classes during the time I would have spent sitting around not being trusted with the money.

Thanks for reading and, don't forget: ROSE KNOWS MONEY*****


*PSAT, ASVAB...took them all just to get out of class.
**Uhhhh, that's my last name. Please don't stalk me, but if you google it, you'll probably end up stalking the German Christian rock band anyway...or a porn star.
***I know this! Longest day of my life was subbing for 1st grade...And it was only 1/2 a day!
****You try spelling it when you're 9 and under all of that pressure!
**** Donations accepted.


Serena said...

I'll readily admit I was one of the geeky kids who did student government. My favorite part? The marketing...coming up with slogans and crap to give away.

And, obviously, those kids were clueless because Rose Knows Money!

CBK said...

Did you just tell us for whom you're voting when you likened Obama to Chad Kroeger? Or am I reading too much into that?

Miss Scarlet said...


Johnny said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
speener said...

Seriously - the best politcal post I've read in a month.

Love it. I also ran for treasurer - in 8th grade, and lost also. I wonder why I chose to run for treasurer. It's like choosing to run for 4th place. Shouldn't I have run for President? At least then, if I lost, I lost running for President.

OK - already over-thinking this. Great post.

(BTW - love the new Ben Folds album).

Johnny DC said...

I'd like to be the treasurer of your underpants.


mijoy said...

This was a hilarious post! Thanks for lightening up my day a bit. I ran for VP in 4th grade and lost. My slogan was "You're crazy if you don't vote Lambiasi".

The next election I participated in was when I was 25 and was elected as Secretary for my security non-profit. I think it took 16 years for me to get over the horror of it all. :)