I don't think I am a nice person, but so often there are these situations where I am just that. Too nice. And nice is such a meek, unactive word. I don't want to be nice. I want to be considerate, yet deliberate. I think that to be described as deliberate can be a great compliment. And considerate, well, that's a given.
It's just that there are these situations I get myself into where I just "okay" it too much and I hate that. What about what I want? What if I don't want to do that or to act that way?
And only semi-related, do I make it easy to be friends with me? I wonder that sometimes. One time, in college, my friend commented that I was the nicest person she knew and was always so easy-going. Now, to those who know me now, please don't laugh. I have definitely become more selfish since then, but in the best way possible, I hope:)
Maybe I should make a more concerted effort to say no more and to be more demanding myself. Anyway....just rambling.
XO,
SVR
5 comments:
I did laugh ;) That said, I know what you mean. Not that I'm too nice...just that I totally understand. I do get like that with some people. Anyway, now I'm rambling. What I'm trying to say is that I agree that you don't want to be a doormat.
For the record, you don't make it too easy for us [;)], and I don't think you're a doormat. You are too nice at some places (*cough* barn) and at certain times with some people (*cough* cunt). I do appreciate how you ignore my bitchier moods though. : )
So I don't make it easy?? Hmmmmm
My therapist (hope i'm not giving too much away here)gave me this advice when I had a similar problem "Whats so special about other people that their opinion of you matters". Hope it helps. Having said that I have trouble saying no also.
That's tricky. I was just talking to my mom about her own family and she said that conflict was rampantly discouraged and one was encouraged to do things they didn't want to with a smile. It's no wonder that she says she has problems saying no to people. I, on the other hand, probably have too little of a problem saying no to people.
But as I've been thinking about often lately, you need to do whatever it is you to because you feel that's what right for you and because it's what you want. Not because you're scared not to. I don't know if that's selfish so much as trying to do the right thing for the right reasons.
Be who you are... I like it! :o)
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